Dangerous Beans

[65% - 71%]

What did she do? She laughed. The idiot.

This was not one of those moments when he wanted to kiss her. [Location 2621]

God, I don't understand how the fuck this relationship would work.

What he wanted to do was storm into that house, punch Dalton in the nose, throw Finley over his shoulder and take her back to the hotel, where she belonged. [Location 2621]

Because women are property and don't you forget it!

Firstly, she had to stay there if they were going to help Jasper and make sure Dalton paid for his crimes. [Location 2621]

A fact she did not at all remember when she went running to Griffin's side that night.  Help Jasper?  He's literally been relegated to the b-plot of this novel because Griffin + Mary Sue's love.

That would appeal to Finley’s dark side. [Location 2629]

Stop mentioning this.  Her dark side is literally just an adrenaline rush she gets when she fights.  It's also been described as basically the rich girl version of looking for danger.  There is no dark side, there's just the Mary Sue's a dumb ass and running off side.

He hadn’t realized, but he had walked out of the darkness into the pool of light from a nearby streetlamp. She could see him. Those sharp eyes of hers could probably make him out plain as day.

The smile slipped from her face as they stared at one another. She set the dagger on the table and crossed the floor to the window. Griffin watched as she placed her palm against the glass, as though to wave at him. [Location 2637]

Literally who even cares about making sure Dalton doesn't know they're together?  Who cares about Griffin remaining inconspicuous?  Who cares about Mary Sue pretending to be all about Dalton?  If the characters aren't interested in keeping up the ruse, I'm not bothered by them acting like idiots.

She’d done it to keep Dalton from seeing him, obviously. Not because she wanted to shut him out. [Location 2637]

She probably shouldn't have immediately changed her expression and went to the window.  She also probably shouldn't have reached out and touched the glass in that melodramatic way.  She should've glanced at him and then turned back to Dalton, but I am, again, asking too much of the characters to think.

He had hidden it there because he knew it would be hard to recover—even harder than the piece from Wildcat. [Location 2646]

The piece that Wildcat was quoted as saying, "I’d rather just give him the thing and send you both on your way”?  Harder to retrieve than literally just having the person hand the thing back to you?

Jasper knew that it would be impossible—even for him— to carry a torch for three girls, but he fell a little bit in love with Finley right then. [Location 2654]

That noise is me furious slamming my head against my keyboard.

“Don’t underestimate her, Jas.” Dalton chuckled. “She’s as smart as she is pretty.” [Location 2654]

Considering how "smart" we've seen her be, it's not much, is it?  XD  I'd be careful of your wording and writing, book.

[66%]

He’d even made the man believe that offering it up was his idea, rather than a suggestion Dalton had planted. [Location 2671]

It'd be nice to see this ~evil genius, but, again I'm asking way too much.

For a man who claimed not to want to be fancy, he sure made a fine stab at it. [Location 2671]

I'm sure if the good guys were doing this, Jasper would be admiring the shit out of them.  Because he's a bad guy, Dalton is ofc getting called out for not wanting to be fancy.

Dalton sat in the front of the box, placing Mei and Finley on either side of him. [Location 2671]

This makes him firing the one dude make more sense.  He just wants to fuck Mary Sue, he's not even really interested in having her on his team or he'd treat her like the rest of his hired muscle.  Because he wants to fuck her so much, he'll take her side in everything.

Jasper and Little Hank sat toward the back, [...] the two other ragtag members of Dalton’s gang waited outside by the carriage. Jasper didn’t remember their names. [2678]

Um, so literally three to four people were holding Jasper hostage?  Why fire the one guy when Mary Sue hasn't been with you as long?  These numbers aren't enough to make me believe Dalton is as much of a crime lord as the book wants me to believe.

How in a rattler’s tail did Griffin stand the blasted things? [Location 2678]

This book only remembers that Griffin is supposed to go by a different code than the other characters when it can either impress you with his title or make a reference to how ~foreign his life is.

“I see your friend has arrived, Jasper. What a coincidence.” [Location 2678]

Everyone is just so stupid.

There [...] sat Griffin, Sam and Emily.

[...]

Would anyone recognize her as the girl who came looking for Finley? [Location 2678]

Money's on no, even tho she MET Dalton and was in his company when he propositioned Mary Sue.  I bet the man Dalton fired for not liking Mary Sue didn't even bother to tell him, "a red head, the same that was there the night you hired Mary Sue, came by and asked Mary Sue to go to the DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKE's side.

He wished someone would look at him the way Emily looked at Sam. [Location 2686]

Considering what Wildcat said about you, someone has.  You just decided to use her and leave her.

“That’s the Duke of Greythorne?” [Location 2686]

Is that?  I just DK anymore!

Meanwhile, Finley looked as though she’d like to strangle the other girl. [Location 2695]

Yeah, but that's Mary Sue's default expression when Mei breathes, so...

[67%]

If Dalton didn’t take his hand from her leg, he was likely to lose it. [Location 2703]

Why the POV hopping with a paragraph break again?  Also, he wouldn't if she wants the plan to go off without a hitch (which she doesn't because she's as stupid as a lump of clay)

Obviously he couldn’t see where Dalton had his hand, but he could tell that it was near or on Finley. The young duke’s jaw was tight, but he nodded in polite greeting at their pointed stares. [Location 2703]

THIS ISN'T EVEN FUCKING ABOUT JASPER BEING CAPTURED ANYMORE.  It's just a pissing contest to see who gets Mary Sue.

Duke point.

“You are a difficult girl to forget, Miss Finley,” Dalton agreed. “You would be an excellent way to divert the duke’s attention. He could be our first test." [Location 2703]

God, I am so over everyone going on and on about how pretty she is.

Duke point.

“When this is over,” Finley whispered as they walked, “we’re going to take turns holding him down while the other beats his pretty face.” [Location 2711]

HAHAHAHHA.  First he didn't say anything remotely offensive to either of you, he just said the DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKE was handsome.  Secondly, you better hope that those three men don't take you out back and shoot you execution style.

She scowled at him. “He’s a ruthless criminal—what else would he do?” [Location 2720]

PRAYING for the execution.

She had a valid point, and it made him feel stupid that he hadn’t thought that far ahead. [Location 2728]

One more point for Mary Sue's ~smartness~

Why did folks bother going to the theater if they were just going to loiter about the entrance and never watch any of it? [Location 2737]

Yeah, nobody could be standing around attempting to walk off a sick feeling, nobody could just be waiting for someone, nobody could just be cleaning, they're all just there to make shit difficult for you.

Fortunately, luck had seen fit to smile on them just a little. [Location 2737]

More like the author did.

[68%]

they’d think she was just an overheated girl talking to her escort, [Location 2745]

You're even giving more reasons people would be in the lobby and yet...

No wonder Griffin fancied her so much—she truly was a remarkably useful girl. [Location 2745]

I'm so over the fawning over Mary Sue in this book.  Good God.

When she’d sent him the name of the theater, Griffin had mentioned that he thought Whip Kirby might be more of a friend to Jasper than an enemy. [...] “But I don’t know you, so you’ll have to forgive me if I don’t just let you have him.” [Location 2779]

Fuck off, Mary Sue.

“You know I’m a friend of the Duke of Greythorne, right?" [Location 2779]

Duke count

[69%]

He nodded, his expression hard. “Though, now that I’ve made your acquaintance, I’m afraid I don’t understand how.” [Location 2787]

#teamanyonebutmarysue

However, since he's mean to her, I assume he'll be a bad guy.

What you need to do is stay here with me long enough for Jasper to get back to Dalton, because if you don’t, Dalton won’t get his machine, and he won’t do whatever it is that’s going to get him arrested. You do want him to be arrested, right?” [Location 2787]

WHY NOT FUCKING SAY THAT FIRST RATHER THAN, "I will break your arm if you do not listen to me"?

He flashed her a disgusted glance. “You realize that there’s a very good chance Renn will be arrested along with Dalton? You, too?”

Actually, Finley hadn’t realized that. [Location 2787]

But b-but... she's as smart as she is pretty!!

“There’s a very good chance the duke [Location 2796]

Duke count

if she was seen talking to Kirby there would be even more trouble—for Jasper. [Location 2804]

Literally none of the characters so far has realized a need for discretion and secrecy, so I doubt it'll be different here.

Lydia Astor-Prynn—the girl she had run into after she’d knocked out Griffin—stood on the stairs talking to several men in black suits. With her was an older woman, who looked so much like her she had to be her mother. They were all staring at Finley. Lydia pointed at her, and when the men moved away to start toward Finley, the blonde girl shot her a smug glance. [Location 2804]

No.  No.  No.  Lydia doesn't know who you are, nor does she give a fuck that you want Griffin all to yourself.  You are holding and threatening a policeman in a public theater.

What if they had guns? [Location 2812]

I'm sure another Mary Sue power would activate and you'd either dodge them super fast or be healed quicker than ever.

He gave her a tiny nod—silently promising that everything would be all right. [Location 2820]

God, ofc, Sam would gladly come around to her way of thinking.  Also, nevermind the 18 police officers that had their eyes on Mary Sue during her sham arrest.

The lighting in the box—in all the audience—was dim so that the stage was the center of attention, but Jasper could see good enough. He could also tell that Griffin and the others were watching from their side of the theater. [Location 2820]

THEN DALTON'S PROBABLY NOTICED TOO.

[70%]

Was that all the consideration Finley got? Jasper wanted to punch Dalton in the face. [Location 2828]

This is actually refreshing tho.  It's nice not seeing everyone get their panties in a twist because Mary Sue is in "danger"

The Duke of Greythorne [Location 2828]

At this point, you can say it with me.

“Don’t mope, Jas. It doesn’t become you.”

“Bugger off,” Jasper growled, borrowing an appropriate phrase he’d picked up in London. [Location 2836]

I don't even understand the characters mood swings from scene to scene.  Nothing has happened other than Jasper reporting he had the piece and Dalton saying, "let's leave and test it" and suddenly Jasper is fucking angry at Dalton.

He smiled, lips curving sharply. “A jailbreak. We’re going to bust Miss Finley out.” [Location 2844]

Oh, nvm, false hope; she was the most important thing.

ropes of hair swinging [Location 2844]

Ugh, this shit again.

“That Astor-Prynn bird set some gentlemen on Finley. [Location 2861]

Lydia's still evil for not bowing to Mary Sue's whims.

[71%]

As they approached the foyer, Mrs. Astor-Prynn and Lydia stopped him. “Your Grace. You will be happy to know the girl who accosted you at our party has been arrested,” the older woman told him smugly.

At that moment Griffin was tempted to summon enough Aether to send the woman flying across to the other side of the theater. Perhaps farther. Somehow he managed to incline his head toward her. “Indeed.” That was all he could say. He didn’t care if it was rude. He turned and walked away from them, leaving the two ladies staring after him in shock.

He didn’t care if he’d behaved badly. He didn’t care what they thought of him or if they told their friends. [Location 2878]

Too bad this has literally nothing to do with the society of the times because that would've ruined him for being rude and started rumors that he was in league with criminals.

I'm also really tired of Lydia and her mom being "smug" about things.  This is just writing designed to get you on Mary Sue's side by being like "woe is she! look at those mean rich women being awful to her!"