Dangerous Beans

This will cover through 100%, since it looks like chapter 19 extends that far and I have something to say about the author's note, but I feel like BL would count the book finished if I put 100%.

[90%]

Wildcat was absolutely the last person Jasper expected to see that evening. [Location 3683]

She's the only other named character in the book, has a romantic history with Jasper, genuflected to Mary Sue following their fight, and Mei is evil and in love with Dalton.  I'm not surprised to see her back.

Jasper wasn’t quite certain what she was, but his time with her had convinced him she was more than merely human. She wasn’t called Wildcat just because of her attitude. [Location 3683]

This isn't even her name...?  She been referred to with some racially loaded terms before and the only thing we get is her nickname is Wildcat.  You are comparing someone who is potentially a POC to an animal.

He wasn’t the least bit surprised to see Cat hanging off the side of the building without the aid of rope. Her claws could dig into the brick, and she was strong enough to support her weight with her fingers and toes. [Location 3683]

So, actual Wolverine now?

[91%]

“There’s a strange rumor going round Five Points.”

[...]“So far, I don’t know what that has to do with me.”

[...] “The rumor is that there’s to be a riot tomorrow night. [Location 3699]

And?

He knew that Wildcat’s grandfather, a freed slave, [Location 3699]

So she IS a POC and has only been referred to as Wildcat?  Jesus, fuck...

That couldn’t be a coincidence; he knew better than that. [Location 3708]

Christ, everyone reading this book knows it's not a coincidence.

“I’ll see what I can do, Cat. Meanwhile, tell your people to stay inside, avoid the normal fighting grounds and not to travel in packs—anything that could be mistaken for aggressive activity.” [Location 3716]

This should be common sense.  The leaders of the gangs should have their people on lock down until this goes away, however it seems like Wildcat hasn't even considered it.

Most of them will listen to me, but those Dead Rabbits and Bowery Boys can be an ornery, stubborn bunch. They might decide to taunt the cops. Idiots." [Location 3725]

Then it's no real loss is it?  You don't want people who antagonize the police and don't listen to what you say.

[92%]

She coshed him with her head again—this time hard enough to knock him out. [Location 3750]

Well, that was almost a good scene, Cross, then Mary Sue came and Mary Sue'd everything up.

but the only way to get there was to traverse the narrow brick ledge that ran around the building.

Good thing she wasn’t afraid of heights. [Location 3758]

ofc she can't knock on his door...

Don’t let me be too late. [Location 3766]

I'm betting Jasper will either have taken care of the problem himself or Mary Sue will arrive and save him and be like, "I FIGURED EVERYTHING OUT BECAUSE I'M A MARY SUE!!!"

Jasper was struggling with his attacker, who appeared to be a bit more skilled than hers. [Location 3766]

Seaux predictable...

Finley walked up behind the man and kicked him hard between his legs. [Location 3766]

Mary Sue to the rescueeeeeee

[93%]

It was at this point that the door to the room crashed open—thanks to the sole of Sam’s boot. He, Emily and Griffin all rushed in. [Location 3773]

So they somehow heard a struggle that nobody else did?

Griffin in nothing but a pair of trousers.

Finley wasn’t the least bit ashamed of stopping what she was doing to simply admire the view. [Location 3773]

It's not important to tie up our attackers when a scrawny bare chested man walks in the room!

if I’m not mistaken.”

“You’re not,” Jasper replied. [Location 3773]

She can't ever be wrong

When she stood, he pulled her against him in a fierce hug. [Location 3782]

I would repeat about the time period, but w/e it falls on deaf ears.

She returned the hug—shamefully, more so she could touch his naked back than comfort him in any way. His skin was warm and smooth. Muscles twitched beneath her palms. When he pulled back their gazes locked, and she knew— knew—that if they had been alone, he would have kissed her. [Location 3782]

NOBODY CARES.  STOP INTERRUPTING THE ACTION TO TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU WANNA FUCK.

“Are you hurt?” he asked.

“No. [...] But Jasper is.”

Emily swept forward, [...] “Let me see.”

[...]

And of course, Sam scowled because the cowboy was wearing a robe and showing an indecent amount of collarbone. [Location 3791]

HOW DO THESE RELATIONSHIPS WORK IF EVERY PARTY IS ALWAYS JEALOUS OF THE OTHER?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?

This series should just be renamed Shipping War Chronicles, even tho it's very plain who will end up with who.

Griffin turned back to Finley. “I feel as though I should apologize for all the trouble you’ve had since meeting me.”

[...]“In case you haven’t noticed, I was attracting trouble long before I met you.” [Location 3799]

Sigh

She didn’t say it in a self-pitying way, because she didn’t feel the least bit sorry for herself. She felt sorry for the people who tried to harm her. [Location 3799]

This is a massive problem with this book.  It wants you to feel sorry for Mary Sue and all the ~trouble~ that society causes her, but it also makes it so that she's never in any real trouble and never faces trouble for long.  You can't feel sorry for her because, due to being a creator's pet, she'll never have anything for you to feel sorry for her for.

“Oy, Finley. What’s the address of Dalton’s house?”

She told him. “Why?”

He shrugged, lifting each man as though the answer was clear. “I’m going to deliver a present.”

“I’ll come with you,” she announced. [Location 3799]

I'm sure one of the two people who easily beat him last time will have a problem beating him again...

“Be careful,” Griffin urged, but he didn’t try to stop her. She liked that. He knew she could look after herself, and even though he worried about her, he had faith in her and her abilities.

That was something like trust, wasn’t it? [Location 3808]

No, that's faith in your abilities, not you.

It also meant that the lobby was deserted, [Location 3808]

LIGHTS!  SOMEBODY Sounds like a hotel clerk is GETTING FIRED!

Apparently New York, like London, was a city that rarely, if ever, slept. [Location 3808]

Unless it's convenient for the protagonists, then everything is free of people.

[94%]

“You waiting for these two?” Finley asked the driver.

[...] The driver nodded. “Yes. They paid me to wait for their return.” [Location 3816]

Was anyone ever doubting that cab was just there because Mary Sue needed it?

It might have been her imagination, but she was fairly certain the cab leaned to one side—Sam’s.

“How much do you weigh?” she inquired.

He frowned. “Plenty.” [Location 3816]

1.) How polite.

2.) Given that the book continuously tells us he's part machine and a huge man, it's not above the realm of imagination to think that he would be heavy.

Obviously Sam had woken up on the wrong side of the bed. Huh. One might think that he was the one who was attacked by a hired assassin. [Location 3824]

FUCK OFF, you asked him about something you KNEW was a sensitive subject to him.

The steam carriage sped down the street, but no shots were fired. Finley was almost disappointed. [Location 3833]

Given how often the book has told us Mary Sue has a reason to be afraid of guns...  WHY is everyone so dumb?

“We could have grabbed him,” Sam replied, his frown slightly deeper than usual.

“And do what with him? [Location 3833]

/BEATS HEAD  PREVENTED HIM FROM USING THE DEVICE.  Since Jasper's said that Little Hank is not a problem for either of you and Dalton relies on guns, you could've clobbered both easily.  The only person left would've been Mei.

To her surprise, a small smile tugged at his lips. “You’re starting to sound like Griffin." [Location 3841]

What?  No she's not...

She didn’t know what she’d done to warrant this friendliness, [Location 3841]

Neither do I.  The book doesn't either.  This is basically Clary and Isabelle all over again.

They arrived back at the hotel and had to use Sam’s telegraph machine—that he had been smart enough to bring— to ask Griffin to come down and pay the driver as neither of them had any money on them. [Location 3841]

But he doesn't mind being used for his money by a woman he met a few weeks ago.  He's in love with her and that makes everything alright!

[95%]

Finley liked dressing up, especially if the gown was also designed to give her freedom to kick arse. [Location 3857]

God, I can't...

but she wore a flexible corset beneath so she could bend and move without difficulty.

[Location 3857]

I'm not an expert, but for the love of fuck that is not a corset.

ropes of her hair [Location 3865]

Ugh

“His poor heart must be broken, being used like that by a girl he loved.” [Location 3873]

Considering that he dated many women after that, I doubt he cares much.

She’s a coldhearted slag.” [Location 3873]

I hate you, Mary Sue.  I wish you'd die.

Emily obviously preferred her own suggestion but saw the merit in Finley’s, [Location 3873]

Considering that she can never be wrong about anything...

They had an event to get to and a villain to stop. [Location 3873]

PLEASE GOD, LET LYDIA'S FATHER HAVE BARRED THEM ENTRY

“Amazing what the right dress can do, isn’t it?” Finley asked with a slightly embarrassed grin.

Griffin offered her his arm. “It’s not the dress—it’s the girl.” [Location 3881]

Mary Sue powers activate!

Despite the gravity of their situation, [Location 3890]

I cannot figure out what they're talking about...

They knew what they had to do, how to do it and had the confidence that they would each be able to play their roles. [Location 3890]

Then goes on to describe said roles and proves how much bullshit the book really is.

[96%]

And she ... well, she was willing to play a little dirtier than her friends. [Location 3898]

SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THIS DARK SIDE.

Finley was the only one who held the same determination where Mei was concerned. She would not allow the girl to get away after all she’d done to Jasper. [Location 3898]

She's been wanting to beat the shit outta Mei since before she ~betrayed Jasper, but keep telling yourself it's only cause she betrayed him.

Finley felt like a princess as she entered the society building on Griffin’s arm. [Location 3898]

Cough cough

The building was just as impressive inside as out. [Location 3906]

Oh, Lydia.  =[  You should've told your father what happened.

Griffin smiled at her. “We can go to some of these sort of events in London if you like."

[Location 3906]

She would be regarded as your whore, despite the book's claims otherwise.  But by all means, do so.  Pretend society would readily accept her after what she did in America made its way across the pond.

but then she remembered that she was not of the same social sphere as Griffin. Here, they could pretend, but back home, everyone would know she was lower-class and shun her. They might shun him, and she didn’t want to be responsible for that. [Location 3906]

Stop.  What's the point in even pretending like the author cares about this?  She never did.  You know damn well she would just write it so that their love would change society and make it accept her.

Each was attuned to the frequencies of their individual voices, so while they would pick up some background noise, they would amplify anything they wished to communicate with one another so that it could be heard by the rest, even in different parts of the building. [Location 3914]

Modern technology can't even do that, so no.

Mr. Tesla had recovered enough to join them but seemed uncomfortable with all the attention he garnered. He was so “twitchy” and withdrawn that Finley didn’t know if he’d be any help to them if they needed it—and the machine was his bloody creation. [Location 3922]

1.) You tried to remember he wasn't a people person, only you did it so late in the game and after explaining that he loved having Emily around EVERY FUCKING DAY.

2.) Emily stole shit from him and was planning to take his plans, he's not obligated to help you idiots.

[97%]

She marveled at his speed. Before Griffin announced Dalton’s arrival, Jasper had been in the same room. Now he was in position on the roof. [Location 3938]

The fight at Dalton's, where neither of you had a problem doing anything, established that he moved like a "blur"  I'm so done.

He didn’t seem so pretty to her, now that she knew how evil he really was. [Location 3938]

Mary Sue would go on and on about how evil he was while he hadn't done anything and now she believes he's evil.

That was when Dalton stuck his hand—the one Finley hadn’t broken [Location 3946]

Ahem: "seized the wrist of the hand holding the pistol. She snapped it like a twig. [Location 3290, 81%]"

Can't keep yourself straight, book.

Would he be brazen enough to try to kill her right then and there? [Location 3953]

Probs and he sadly won't succeed.  ='[

because Jas was likely to kill the bounder. [Location 3961]

And then really go away for both that murder and the murder he was trying to clear his name for.

but not before she managed to land a solid punch of her own to Mei’s pretty face. [Location 3961]

Literally nothing bad can ever happen to the characters.

She raced to Griffin as he stopped dead in his tracks and began to concentrate.

His hands shook. Was he afraid that the “ghost” might be waiting for him? Or was he worried that he might not be able to shut the machine down and Dalton would get away? [Location 3969]

ALTERNATIVELY HE COULD JUST BE FUCKING CONCENTRATING, AS YOU SAID.

[98%]

He raked a hand [Location 3977]

Ugh

“What the tarnation ... ? Griff, there’s something going on. I’m going down.” [Location 3977]

Well there goes, "we can all play our positions and play them well."

“Can you help her?”

Emily shook her head, her face a study in anguish and remorse. [Location 3994]

She won't or doesn't want to.  She's on Mary Sue's side in all this.

And then she was gone. Her eyes changed, and all the tension left her body, and that’s how he knew that she was dead. [Location 4002]

So, Gary Stu just killed someone.  Let's see if anything comes of this, whether it be trauma for fucking with something he doesn't understand, trauma for killing someone, or even an arrest.

Griffin managed a small smile as the cold night air numbed his cheeks. He was on the narrow deck on the front of the airship, leaning against the rail. [Location 4008]

Nothing.  Of fucking course.  Couldn't let anything happen to Gary there, huh.

Mei was dead because of him. It didn’t matter that it had been her own greed that had brought her there in the first place. [Location 4015]

Are you victim blaming again, book?

He would have even let Dalton get away if it meant that Mei might live. [Location 4015]

You can stop pretending you actually care about her, book.  I have several angry posts worth of notes about how much your Mary Sue wanted her dead and how Jasper threatened to shoot her himself.  You can stop.

[99%]

“It was good of you to give him that money,” Finley remarked quietly, [Location 4023]

HE IS LITERALLY ONLY A DUKE SO HE CAN THROW MONEY AROUND

“But I’m delighted to see the backside of Miss Astor-Prynn.”

That actually brought a small smile to his lips. “I didn’t notice her backside. Was it nice?”

She squeezed his fingers. “Ow!” he cried, but it hadn’t hurt—not really. “Bloody hell, woman.”

“Take that as a warning, Your Grace. I can beat you into shape if need be. [Location 4032]

Um, did she seriously just turn her Mary Sue powers on him for saying he DIDN'T notice another woman's ass?

HOW DOES THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK??!??!!!!

And don’t think you’re going to be allowed to wallow in guilt with me around. [Location 4032]

OFC, having to feel remorse for the woman he murdered doesn't work for the story.  It also adds to the fact that Mary Sue isn't actually upset about the murder.

Do I make myself clear?”

[...] “Crystal,” he replied. [Location 4032]

Ahem: "Am I understood?”

“Perfectly.”

Finley noticed that he hadn’t agreed to her terms, [Location 1799, 44%]"

And then Whip Kirby put those irons around my wrists, and I realized the consequences of being an idiot. [Location 4040]

Is this to fool the people who skip to the end?  I was there, I remember this.  He did it to escort her out and literally told her, "don't worry, I'll get you out of here, play along"

“It’s cold out here,” she said. “We should go in.”

“I suppose we should.” Then she came up on her toes and kissed him, and all thoughts of going inside and cold noses vanished for a while. [Location 4049]

That's nice and all that, but I'm cold, love, let's go in now.

[100%]

"The expense will be worth it just to see Sam flap.” [Location 4057]

I can't, I'm so glad this is the end.

Author’s Note

One of my favorite parts of writing a book is the research I get to do. [Location 4065]

IDK what kinda research she was actually doing, but I'm gonna present that without further comment because I'M DONE WITH THIS BOOK.  O/  Thank fuck.